This is an interesting question for some parents. Most would say the obvious answer is “Yes”; here’s a different answer from a financial coach’s perspective…how about an “It Depends. “
Most parents do feel an obligation to pay for their child’s college but failed to plan for it and now guess what? It’s here.
A Wall Street Journal article addresses it this way: “For many families, especially those relatively well-off, the idea of who will pay for college is a given: It is the parents’ responsibility.
But should it be? On one side, parents want to give their children the best chance for a happy, financially sound future. They don’t want their kids starting out in life burdened with student debt—a burden that could be substantial given that the total cost of a four-year college education may approach a quarter-million dollars these days.”
A paper by Laura Hamilton, a sociology professor at University of California, Merced, larger contributions from parents are linked to lower grades among students at a variety of four-year colleges.
The study’s results are striking because most parents assume that the more money they pay for their children’s education, the better their children will perform. If students don’t have to spend time working a job to support themselves, goes the thinking, and they aren’t burdened by the weight of heavy loans, they will be free to study more diligently.
“But it turns out that students whose educational costs are paid for entirely by their parents, engage in more leisure activities. In other words, they party instead of study. Most students don’t party so hard that they flunk out of college, but they do damage to their academic performance.”
So what should parents do? Parents should consider having a heart to heart discussion with their children early on about the costs of college and what kind of performance they expect. “Make it clear that it is their responsibility to do well. Have them seek out scholarship and grant monies, there are plenty of programs available; they just have to seek them out. Explain to them that there are conditions on the money. My favorite quote to my own kids. “My love is unconditional, my money is not. There are conditions on my money.”
Tell them “I’m going to give you this money to for tuition, books and purchase of supplies for classes. I’m not going to fund your Spring Break trips or pizza parties.” It is also important that the child/students be required to get a part-time job or work-study position to create some income and savings. Teach them budgeting skills early on in their development.